Using Your Super Senses to Read People: 3 Techniques

 


My role as a psychiatrist is to read individuals, to understand who they are in addition to what they say. I want to peek past their masks and into the true person through deciphering verbal and nonverbal signs. Using logic alone won't give you a complete picture of somebody. To learn to read the crucial non-verbal intuition signs that individuals give out, you must submit to other essential sources of information. You must also be willing to let go of any preconceived notions or emotional baggage, such as long-held grudges or ego-clashes, that prevent you from seeing someone clearly in order to do this.

The key is to remain objective and receive information neutrally without distorting it.

Try these people-reading techniques from The Power of Surrender, my book. All of them demand giving up pure logic in favor of accepting additional, non-linear forms of input.

3 Techniques to Read People

1. The First Technique – Observe Body Language Cues

Research has shown that words account for only 7 percent of how we communicate whereas our body language (55 percent) and voice tone (30 percent) represent the rest. Here, the surrender to focus on is letting go of trying too hard to read body language cues. Don’t get overly intense or analytical. Stay relaxed and fluid. Be comfortable, sit back, and simply observe.

Here are a few examples of the Body Language Cues. I outline many more useful techniques in The Power of Surrender:

1. Pay Attention to Appearance

When reading others notice: Are they wearing a power suit and well-shined shoes, dressed for success, indicating ambition? Jeans and a t-shirt, indicating comfort with being casual? A tight top with cleavage, a seductive choice? A pendant such as a cross or Buddha indicating spiritual values?

2. Notice Posture

When observing someone's posture, consider whether they are holding their heads high and seem confident. Or do they stroll unsure of themselves or huddle in fear? Do they carry themselves with a cocky swagger and a puffed-up chest?

 3. Watch For Physical Movements

a) Leaning and Distance

Watch how people slant. We tend to gravitate toward people we like and steer clear of people we don't.

 b) Crossed arms and legs

This posture hints at self-defense, rage, or defensiveness. People often cross their legs with the toes of the top leg pointing in the direction of the person they feel most comfortable with.

c) Hiding one’s hands

 People often give the impression that they are concealing something when they put their hands in their pockets, laps, or behind their backs.

d) Lip biting or cuticle picking

People who bite, lick, or pick at their cuticles do it in an effort to calm themselves when under stress or in an uncomfortable circumstance.

4. Interpret Facial Expression

 Our faces can permanently display our emotions. Deep frown lines imply worry or excessive thought. Crow's feet are the joyful grin lines. Lips pursed indicate rage, disdain, or resentment. Teeth grinding and a clinched jaw are indications of strain.

2. The Second Technique – Listen to Your Intuition

Beyond their words and body language, you can read someone. What you feel in your stomach, not what your intellect tells you, is intuition. Instead of using logic, you are perceiving nonverbal knowledge through visuals, "ah-has," and physical knowings. The most important factor in understanding someone is their true nature, not their outward appearance. Your intuition will help you see beyond the obvious to uncover a deeper narrative.

Checklist of Intuitive Cues

1. Honor your gut feelings

In particular during initial meetings, when a visceral reaction happens before you have a chance to think, pay attention to what your gut says. It indicates your level of comfort. Gut reactions are fast and primitive in nature. They serve as your personal truth gauge, helping you decide who to believe.

 

2. Feel the goosebumps

Goosebumps are wonderful intuitive tingles that let us know when someone is moving or inspiring us, or when they are expressing something that resonates with us. Deja-vu, or the feeling that you know someone even though you haven't met them, can also give you goosebumps.

 3. Pay attention to flashes of insight

 In conversations, you may get an “ah-ha” about people who comes in a flash. Stay alert. Otherwise, you might miss it. We tend to go onto the next thought so rapidly these critical insights are lost. So, pay attention when you read people.

4. Watch for intuitive empathy

It is a powerful sort of empathy when you can occasionally physically sense the physical signs and feelings of other individuals. Therefore, when interpreting others, pay attention to things like, "Does my back hurt when it didn't before? "Am I depressed or upset after an unproductive meeting? "Ask for feedback to discover if this is empathy.

 

3. The Third Technique – Sense Emotional Energy

A beautiful manifestation of our energy, or the "vibe" we emit, are our emotions. These are picked up by intuition. Some people make you feel good and are excellent for your health. You want to run away out of instinct because they drain you. Despite being invisible, this "subtle energy" can be sensed up to a few feet or even inches from the body. It is known as chi in Chinese medicine and is a vitality that is fundamental to health.

Strategies to Read Emotional Energy

1. Sense People’s Presence

This is the total energy we give out, which may or may not match our words or actions. It is the emotional environment that surrounds us, similar to a cloud or the sun. Do they exude a welcoming atmosphere that draws you in as you read? Or are you trembling and reversing course?

 2. Watch people’s eyes

Strong energy are transmitted through our eyes. Studies show that the eyes also emit an electromagnetic signal that extends outside of the body, just like the brain does. Spend some time observing how people look. Do they seem worried? Sexy? Tranquil? What Does That Indicate? angry? Find out if they appear to have a partner at home by observing their eyes. Or do they appear guarded or concealed?

3. Notice the feel of a handshake, hug, and touch

Through physical contact, we transfer emotional energy, much like an electrical current. Does a hug or handshake seem cozy, at ease, and assured? Or is it repulsive enough that you wish to distance yourself? Are hands clammy and indicating anxiety? Or is it limp, implying reticence and timidity?

 4. Listen for People’s Tone of Voice and Laugh

 Our voice's volume and tonality reveal a lot about our emotions. Frequencies of sound cause vibrations. Consider how a person's tone of speech impacts you when reading them. Do you feel comforted by their tone? Or is it rude, sarcastic, or whiny?



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